2013... a new year and a new outlook on life.
I don't know what happened to 2012. I think I say that every year. Just like every year on my birthday I think to myself.... What happened to 17? Didn't I just get my driver's license?
2012.... a year full of STUFF.
New kitchen at the Dwyer house.
New addition, both master suite and new baby boy.
New job for hubby(after a stressful layoff during the master suite addition and prior to new baby addition. YIKES.)
And the regular stuff too.... soccer games, dance lessons, Sunday school, swim lessons, vacation, work, juggling, juggling, and more juggling.
And as I'm sure with most families... now that the year is over, I'm looking back and thinking to myself... WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?
The year went by so fast, it scares me.
Did I make the most of it?
Do I even REMEMBER it?
I don't really know....
The holidays came and went in a flash....and I look back and did I even enjoy myself Did I enjoy my kids??
Not really. I spent so much time shuffling the family back and forth to visit other people/families and make sure that THEY were happy...but I didn't spend time thinking...
"What is going to make US happy?"
All I wanted was to sit with my husband and kids... look at our cute Christmas tree.... listen to Christmas music, play a board game or two, make cookies and watch Christmas movies.... instead, we drove to New Jersey and crammed in way too much the weekend before Christmas, came back home and it was over and done with before we even knew it.
I was overwhelmed and unimpressed and I felt like the true meaning and spirit of Christmas was totally lost.
And if I felt that way... how did my kids feel?
I know as I look around my house.... there are still gifts from relatives and friends(from our various visits to other people's houses) that remain unopened(sorry, folks!)
And I'm thinking.... if it wasn't the toys and books and games they wanted or NEEDED, what was it?
It was my time. OUR time. Family time. That was what they wanted. (I know, this is sounding vaguely similar to the Grinch storyline , isn't it? "Maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas means just a little bit more....")
I spoke with my three girls yesterday about Christmas next year....and my oldest exclaimed, "But MOM... its ONLY JANUARY!!!" And I told her that it was never too early to try to make things better for the next time around.
We discussed spending more times doing the things that WE as a family wanted to do together... instead of rushing around trying to do too many things with not enough time .... and not enjoying any of it. They completely agreed with me.
In fact, they were delighted when I suggested a Christmas Eve of cookie making for Santa, the children's service at church, dinner with just our family and a Christmas movie snuggled on the couch before bed!
They LOVED the idea. I loved it more than they did.
So...all that said
My intention for 2013 is to stop and look around...enjoy and breathe.
To live in the moment with my family. To do what is right for US right now.
2012 was spent in fast forward...always looking ahead....instead of seeing right now.
But really...all we have is RIGHT NOW.
And honestly, I fear that I've missed out on a LOT.
And I highly doubt I'm the only mother who feels this way. We're all so hung up on what comes next... and can you blame us? There are schedules to keep... because really, who can fit all this in?.... work, appointments, practices, games, etc. throw the holidays in there and it's the perfect storm! Every second is accounted for, but nothing is enjoyed, cherished or even remembered!
I can't repair what's already over and done with, but I CAN make the moving forward the way I want it...or least try.
So ...2013... bring it on! We're ready for fun times and wonderful memories... and living in the RIGHT NOW.
Happy New Year to all!
Peace, Love and RIGHT NOW